The time has come.
I have been waiting for it. Expecting it. Anticipating it. You all know what I am talking about.
Months after you give birth. Things are finally settling in. The weight is slowly shedding. Life is starting to find some normalcy again. Then just went all is well with your world.
Everyone. Its time to join me in my funeral for my hair loss. This is just the starting stages. Let me set the scene for you.
So there I was, in my groove. Hot shower. I’m talking so hot , your body looks like a lobster. I can’t have it any other way. I like to feel the heat of the shower, HOURS after I am out.
I am bubbilin’ up my hair, when all of a sudden:
“ah, what is that?!”
Guys, …. I feel something. Not the something that is your husband creeping a hand from behind the shower curtain, I am talking something tickling my leg.
Now I know I am not the best at keeping my legs baby ass smooth. I mean the attempt is there. But I fail. So I know it was not my leg hair that got all out of control. Nope.
I reach… every so lightly and….OMG.
My butt became a collect-all for hair sliding down my back, and finding a cozy spot while in the shower, in my ass crack.
My ass is the holder of all run away hairs.
The world-wide fund of ” save Courtney’s hair” will be coming at you soon. Or send hats. Maybe I will practice my comb over technique now. Gosh, I remember the first time this happened. I damn near cried. I thought I was dying. No one warned me of the INSANE hair loss that comes after a baby. This time, I knew it was gonna happen at some point. I was ready for it this time. I just was not ready for it to surprise me, in the shower, tickling my leg, while my ass held it hostage.
The good news, is your hair comes back around 6-12 months. No biggie. I’ll just tie the hair I have left back in a pony tail and call it a day.
Till then, I guess I will just keep randomly discovering new ass hair, that does not belong there, and do my best to catch it before it clogs my drain. Because like hell I am touching it once it hits the drain. Gross.